Thursday, April 03, 2003



I'm glad that after two weeks of fighting in Iraq, we've finally been able to zero in on a real story: the rescue of 19 year-old West Virginia cutie Jessica Lynch from the hands of the infidels. I'm not going to bother with bullshit disclaimers like, of course I'm glad she's safe, and I support the troops, blah, blah, blah, because I really couldn't care less.

I just want to point out a few strange things. All my information is from a Washington Post article. I don't think it's a coincidence that the first high-profile POW was a woman. One of the things the Administration and the pro-warbies have been harping on is the state of women in the Middle East. So, a female soldier acting heroically against these chauvinist mongols is, shall we say, a real propaganda victory, with a dash of poetic justice thrown in. Also, since the ingrate Iraqis aren't exactly lining up to be liberated, it is nice to see a pretty, all-American photogenic rescued after we've endured photo after photo of those miserable-looking sand people. They're not like us. They're hardly human. Not like Jessica. Sigh.

The unnamed US officials have described her heroism in the face of capture, as reported in the Post: "[She] fought fiercely and shot several enemy soldiers after Iraqi forces ambushed the Army's 507th Ordnance Maintenance Company, firing her weapon until she ran out of ammunition." I detect a bit of the Gulf of Tonkin here; that incident never even happened, but the New York Times had no trouble describing n detail the pitched battle. Private Lynch was the only survivor of the incident, and I'm going to give her the benefit of the doubt, and assume she wouldn't have related such a self-aggrandizing report, seeing as the rest of her unit is dead, and she's probably not much in a condition to talk right now (the article suggests she has not been debriefed yet).

Isn't it disturbing that Private Lynch is being praised for fighting to the death? "She was fighting to the death," the official said. "She did not want to be taken alive." I thought our respect for life was what separated from the terrorists. Aren't we supposed to encourage, maybe killing everyone else? To paraphrase Patton, nobody ever won a war by dying for their country.

In conclusion, I will observe that she's adorable, and on a note of what should be considered hypocrisy, condemn Senator Pat Roberts for saying, "Talk about spunk!" which is something nobody would say about a guy. I'm sure when the time comes, Senator Roberts will congratulate the "little lady" personally.

Those are my confused thoughts.
I was watching a porn movie I downloaded last night. And while I'm sure nobody will believe this, I downloaded it by mistake; I noticed it in my folder when someone started uploading it. In this file sharing thing, it's really easy to download the wrong thing and not notice it. So I cancelled the upload, and watched the movie before deleting it. So I'm watching this couple fuck in a swimming pool, and I notice something: the woman's crotch is absolutely covered in welts of some kind. Due to the screen resolution and small size, it was hard to tell if they were herpes, or genital warts, or something else. But, jesus, that guy must have been a real professional. I should have made a note of the actress' name, to warn the world.

Wednesday, April 02, 2003

I guess it is contraversial to compare one' s self with Adolph Hitler, but on the other hand, at least the people of Zimbabwe can't say they didn't know it was coming. Extra points for saying it at a funeral.

Mugabe Equates Himself to Hitler

The Daily News (Harare)
NEWS
March 26, 2003
Posted to the web March 26, 2003

By Brian Mangwende, Chief Reporter

PRESIDENT Mugabe stunned the nation last Friday when he equated himself to the German butcher of the Nazi era, Adolf Hitler, saying he was going to ruthlessly clamp down on dissenting voices in the country.

Hitler massacred over six million Jews and other minority groups whom he perceived to be his opponents.

Addressing mourners at the burial of Swithun Mombeshora, the Minister of Higher and Tertiary Education, at the National Heroes' Acre, Mugabe, who sports a Hitlerite moustache, said: "I remember when in 1976 we met with the British at the Geneva Conference and at that time the British and their friends were focused on Mugabe and Nkomo. "I was the Hitler of that time. I am still a Hitler of their time. If Hitler fought for the justice of mankind, many nations would not have fought against him.

"Hitler in Zimbabwe has one objective - sovereignty for his people, recognition of their independence and their rights to freedom. If they say I am Hitler, let me be Hitler ten-fold and that's what we stand for."

Mugabe made the remarks on the backdrop of unprecedented torture, arrests and assaults allegedly by State security agents countrywide on civilians.

Last week, a man was beaten to death and several others, including opposition Members of Parliament, were beaten up and/or arrested as soldiers, the police and Central Intelligence Organisation agents cracked down on residents they suspected of participating in the two-day mass stayaway.

Richard Boucher, the spokesperson for the State Department of the United States, immediately condemned the retributions.

He said the upsurge in official violence is directly attributable to Mugabe's speech last Friday in which he said he could be a "black Hitler ten-fold" in crushing his opponents. "Since the beginning of this year, government officials and supporters have sharply escalated repression of all forms of dissent," Boucher said.

"This repression has grown increasingly violent. "In the run-up to this week's parliamentary by-elections in two pro-opposition districts, the ruling party has made clear its intent to win at any cost and has used violence and manipulation of food stocks to intimidate voters."

The US government said Harare should immediately cease its campaign of violent repression, and identify and bring to justice the perpetrators of these serious and widespread human rights abuses.

In a statement, Boucher said: "The United States strongly condemns the unprecedented violence carried out by the Zimbabwe government against domestic opponents. "Over the past three days, the government of Zimbabwe has embarked on a massive retribution campaign against opposition officials, supporters, and other critics of the regime.

"This wave of violence and intimidation follows last week's successful and largely peaceful two-day work stoppage organised by the main opposition party, the MDC. "Since then, over 400 opposition supporters have been arrested, beaten, and in some cases tortured by individuals in police and military uniform.

"Over 250 people have required hospitalisation and at least one person has died. "Women have been sexually assaulted by police or military officers."

He said violence directed against opposition parties and their supporters has become a standard pre-election tactic of Mugabe's government over the past three years.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Copyright © 2003 The Daily News. All rights reserved. Distributed by AllAfrica Global Media (allAfrica.com).

Tuesday, April 01, 2003

I think I'm going to start up an anti-abortion mail list or something. That way, when some chimp adds me to their anti-war mail list, I can respond in time. Jesus, how presumptuous.
The Wilco Documentary, " I Am Trying to Break Your Heart, arrives today on dvd. Out of laziness and the desire to fill space, here's my original review of the movie, from last Fall:

Saw I am Trying to Break Your Heart last night. Entertaining, but no Gimme Shelter. Tells the story of Wilco recording their album Yankee Hotel Foxtrot, which I haven't heard, but is apparently well-regarded in some circles (I prefer the innovative sounds of Gram Parsons), and how the band struggled to get it released . The best parts were the scenes of the band playing; to the film's credit, we saw many complete performances. Jeff Tweedy is an interesting case study, someone who is able to communicate through music and lyrics, but is completely inarticulate when it comes to speaking. Probably a full ten minutes of film were spent with him sighing and scratching his head.

Other low points include Rolling Stone hack David Fricke, who blathers pretentiously about Wilco's genius and the decline of American society. I'm not exaggerating when I say Fricke should be shot. With his hair and his faux-counterculture ideals, it seemed like the filmmmakers had dug a trench into some particularly repulsive strata of Seventies tar pit and this guy fell out. There's also a cameo by former musician, current hanger-on Dave Pirner. When I subscribed to Rolling Stone in college, his smug, obsequious mug invaded every issue in the Random Notes, hanging out with any musician unlucky enough to be in the same industry awards show. Sad to see he's still a groupie.

The most interesting thing about the film was the way the camera affected just about everything that occured. The endless discussions and arguments in the studio were clearly exacerbated by band members performing for the filmmakers. A scene where the manager chews out an anonymous Reprise flack demonstrates the same thing.

Despite the filmmakers' boast on their website that this is a "true documentary," director Sam Jones is clearly a fan of the band (he told Vanity Fair he wanted to portray "a great American rock band at the height of its creative powers."), determined to show them in the best light; the films even sides with the band when Jay Bennett is fired. After the termination, Tweedy affects the high road and refuses to discuss it, while the manager, Tony Margherita, sneers that Bennett will be playing in from of 35 people. Cut to Bennett playing in front of 35 people, singing a shitty folk song. I don't know anything about the man. If he has talent then it is dishonest to excerpt such a crapopy song. If he really is so untalented, then it is viscous to make such a point of it. Regardless, the implication is clear: Wilco is better off without him. Cruel and uneccessary.
So, I got April fooled today. I've been sitting around with this package I need to send. I didn't send it yesterday because, as I complained to my co-worker Kate, the lines were too long. She replied, "that must be because the rates went up today." To which I said, "Oh, fuck." Then she said, "Aptil fool!" I can't beleive it. Now I'm going to have to slash her tires or something.

Monday, March 24, 2003

One-minute Oscar commentary: Halle Berry's dress inspired me in my fight against Iraq. Is Keanu Reeves retarded? Is it in bad taste to make a joke about Robert Blake shooting his wife to a room full of people who presumeably know him? Please tell me Daniel Day Lewis wasn't fucking crying after U2 played. Michael Moore is a fat douchebag: why did he start yelling? It made him look like an idiot. My favorite smug Hollywood moment occured when the editor of Chigaco thanked its director, Rob Marshall, for his "vision" and they cut to Marshall in the audience, whispering, "you're welcome." God, that was so self-important and beautiful, I almost cried. I actually thought it was pretty cool Adrian Brody won Best Actor. I mean, he's my age, all the other nominees had won before (they all looked genuinely happy for him, except for Michael Caine), and it was his first nomination. I felt sort of bad for Brody during his speech, though: if I looked down from my podium to see Richard Gere nodding his head in sanctimonious agreement, I'd seriously reconsider what I was saying. And I thought it was a nice touch they did Best Actress in a later and more prestigious spot than Best Actor. Small, nice gesture. And I didn't see nine out of ten of the nominated films, so I have no opinion on the winners or nominees.

Friday, March 21, 2003

This article is hilarious. I love the idea of one of those Oregon anarchist kids sitting in a war room with an Iraqi official. Boy, the look on those Iraqi officials faces must be priceless.

Human shields await bombs in Baghdad
From anarchists to Quakers, they've followed their principles to put their lives on the line with the civilians of Iraq

Baghdad -- The ultimatum issued by President Bush on Monday dramatically increases the chance that Faith Fippinger may die in the next few days.

Fippinger, a 52-year-old retired schoolteacher is one of about 90 "human shields" who are putting their bodies on the line in front of potential U.S. bombing targets in Iraq.

Since early February, the Sarasota, Fla., native has slept every night at the Daura oil refinery, a huge complex at the southern edge of Baghdad that supplies the entire metropolitan region with gasoline and other fuels. In the 1991 Persian Gulf War, the refinery was destroyed by U.S. missiles, and it burned for a month and a half.

Fippinger expects another attack.

"I may die here," she said calmly. "But my death is no more or less important than the Iraqi lives that will be lost -- for example, my neighbors, who live next to the refineries, a woman who brings in tea every morning."

Then Fippinger broke into tears.

Together with other human shields from the United States and elsewhere, Fippinger hopes her body might yet clog the gears of war.

But while Pentagon planners reportedly want to avoid bombing civilian infrastructure targets, Gen. Tommy Franks, the U.S. commander of the military campaign, has said potential targets would not necessarily be spared just because of the presence of human shields.

The volunteers are organized loosely by Human Shields, a London organization that is an ungainly conglomeration of 23 nationalities, mostly Europeans and Turks, along with six Americans.

The organization has been riven with dissension. Last month, the Iraqi government expelled five of its leaders after a dispute over which sites would be guarded by the volunteers. The group's leaders wanted to position shields at sites such as hospitals, while the government proposed sites it viewed as more strategic, including military installations. Other shields have returned home and denounced the Iraqi government as repressive.

'SOME FRUITCAKES AMONG US'
"We have a bad impression of the human shields. Some of them are crazy," said an Iraqi Foreign Ministry official, who requested anonymity.

"Yes, there are some fruitcakes among us," said Marc Eubanks, a Wyoming native and Air Force veteran who now lives in Athens, Greece. He was referring to some anarchists, who he said could provoke major culture clashes with Iraqi officials at joint meetings.

"But nobody can tell me that we haven't been an outstanding success," said Eubanks, who has been living at the Dura Electrical Power Plant, which supplies a third of Baghdad's electricity and was bombed in the Gulf War. "We were poorly organized, but we lurched forward."

The Bush administration has said little about the human shields. In February, a State Department spokeswoman responded to a reporter's question about why they were in Iraq by saying, "You might as well ask me why moths fly into porch lights."


NUMBERS UNCERTAIN
It is unclear exactly how many foreign activists are in Iraq, because even at this late date, many are still entering and leaving the country. But organizers estimate there may be about 120 to 150 activists in Baghdad when the U.S. attack starts.

Although the human shields are under no obligation to remain once the war begins, most say they will stay put even when the bombs start falling.

For the American activists, a lingering question is: What happens if they survive the war? Once they return to the United States, will they be prosecuted under the U.S. Patriot Act for supporting the enemy?

"The truth is, I'm more afraid of what the Americans would do if they caught me," said Eubanks. "The Americans will probably make Camp X-ray here and put me in it," he said, referring to the U.S. POW camp in Guantanamo, Cuba,

that is holding accused al Qaeda members.

As a U.S. war draws ever closer, the disappointment felt by the remaining activists is palpable.

"More than a letdown, it's a catastrophe, a huge punishment heaped on innocent people," said Kathy Kelly, the coordinator of Voices in the Wilderness, an activist group with headquarters in Chicago and London.

In recent months, Voices in the Wilderness and other U.S. groups, most of whom share Voices' origin in liberal Catholic, Quaker and other religious groups, have held many vigils in Baghdad and other Iraqi cities.


TENSIONS AMONG GROUPS
Kelly hinted at the subtle tension between her organization and Human Shields. While Voices in the Wilderness and other Western activist groups have accepted no aid from the Iraqi government, lodging and food expenses for the human shields has been paid for by the regime.

"We don't want to be under the propaganda wing of the party," said Kelly. "We are independent."

"I respect the human shields," but I wouldn't want to be taking anything from the government," said Charlie Liteky, a San Franciscan who is a member of Voices in the Wilderness. Liteky won the Congressional Medal of Honor in 1968 for his work as an Army chaplain in Vietnam, when he pulled 22 wounded soldiers out of a firefight against the Viet Cong.

"But in the end, we're all waiting for the same bombs," Liteky said. "And we may be in the same jail together after the war."

Thursday, March 20, 2003

Hey, are we at war? I can't even tell anymore.

Tuesday, March 18, 2003

You know, my day was going fine until George Bush announced I had 48 hours to leave the country. Fuuuuck! I wanted to sell a bunch of comic books on Ebay, and now I'm screwed.

Saturday, March 15, 2003

Holy shit, some ha-ha funny shit on The Comics Journal Message Board. The players are Bobby London, underground cartoonist, Ariel Bordeaux, a cartoonist, and Fantagraphics Books co-publisher Kim Thompson:

Bobby London: I didn't intend to repeat myself or bring this thread back to the original topic but
this time around, what's good for Mickey
Mouse is good for cartoonists everywhere.
Considering how artists still get treated
by society (not to mention by other artists),
I see no shame in their descendants reaping
benefits from their efforts especially if
they themselves never see such benefits in
their lifetimes. If they do, so much the better but, last time I looked, the cliche'
still holds. For every Mozart, there's a
Salieri with spade in hand and publishers
tend to treat the Salieris of the world with
equaniminity.

Bobby London: P.S. Feminists hate guys who have their shit
together.

Ariel B.: Hey Bobby, can you explain that last sentence? Because it totally offends me, and I think you are pro rape.

Bobby London :"Having your shit together" in the hippie handbook meant merely being able to take care
of yourself and meet your personal responsiblities, not losing your marbles
and committing sexual assault. Where in the previous post did I use the "r" word?
In the event this is not a joke, it goes like
this: my experience has been that radical feminists didn't like guys who had careers,
preferred to have them around for pedicures. That's all I meant.

Kim Thompson: Ariel Bordeaux 2, Bobby London 0. I've rarely seen a more elegant deflection of a male-chauvinist-pig rant, and Ariel gets the extra point because Bobby completely missed the irony.
A person less kind than me might ask how a cartoonist would have any first-hand knowledge of feminists' distaste for men with careers.

Thursday, March 13, 2003

The thing I liked about the current eps of Angel, especially last week, is they've done a really good job re-introducing Faith. In fact, even though Faith has been on the show once before, for all purposes, she's been introduced as a new character, especially since most of the cast has never heard of her before. So, you get a good sense of her history, without a lot of exposition. I think I'd be enjoying it even more if I had never heard of Faith before in my life. When Buffy appeared on the first season, they were really lazy about it, rather than imbuing Buffy as someone from Angel's past, and dealing with her as back story, they just relied on the continuity from another show. The way they've treated Faith is like how they treated Darla: we knew Darla sired Angel, and we knew he killed her. Admittedly, that was all there was to Darla at that point. And even more admittedly, I just watched the Faith episode from the first season of Angel where they made major trade of the similarities of Faith's redemption to when Angel gained his soul, and Darla was in that, in I think was her first appearance on Angel (nope, her second, never mind).

I get the sense that even though they're denying plans for a Faith series, the current run on Angel sure as hell seems like what a Faith The Vampire Slayer show would be like. A lot more brutal.

Compare Faith fighting Angel to when Buffy fought Angel in her second season. Jesus. Okay, now when you watch the old Buffy episodes, you can see Angel's stunt double is bald and Buffy's is a fat guy, and the new Angel-Faith fights are totally ripping off Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon, but man, there's just some brutal shit going on. Buffy and Angel just weren't even trying. Maybe it was characterization: Angel was real big on tormenting them for a while, but just killing them right quick in the actual fight. Maybe Faith is just more of a badass and needs more of a beat down. It was funny how they gave the fanboys a Faith-in-the-shower scene, but made it so horrible nobody could get turned on. I mean, is it just me, or does Sarah Michelle Gellar look cuter with a bruised face? I'm amazed how thay've taken Eliza Dushku's slutty cheerleader features and actually made her look like a girl whose been doing time.

Other comments on the show: I dislike Connor. I dislike fat Cordelia. I dislike Cordelia letting Connor put his greasy mitts all over her. When will it end? And how about the karaoke demon getting added to the credits? Go Lorne!
My shit didn't sell on Ebay. You ungrateful fucks.

Friday, March 07, 2003

I have a couple Ebay auctions that end this Sunday. Seeing as how I have nothing else to say, please feel free to bid on these great collectibles, and take them off my hands. I won't tell you what they are. Just look! And bid! Please...

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&category=1573&item=2513004542&rd=1

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&category=3969&item=2162872093&rd=1
My friend Erin Norlin's art is featured on the front page of www.seattlesucks.com. I don't really care for her style in the piece, but I like promoting her. If you have feedback for her you can post it there. In fact, do go to that forum and terrorize the chimps.

Wednesday, March 05, 2003

I have just received the strangest email. Am I weird for thinking this could be porn? Or it may be some innocuous Asian culture group? Am I wrong being equananimous with either option?


=================================




Hello,

I've added you to my teamomni group at Yahoo! Groups, a free,
easy-to-use email group service. As a member of this group, you
may send messages to the entire group using just one email address:
teamomni@yahoogroups.com. Yahoo! Groups also makes it easy to
store photos and files, coordinate events, and more.

Here's a description of the group:
------------------------------------------------------------------------

click to go to :::teamomni.net:::





click to visit our :::teamomni.forum:::




WARNING: change your club e-mail settings when joining, simply go
to "Edit My Membership" and then to "Message Delivery" and click on
"Special Notices"... promoters/editors/casting agents (bookings): business@teamomni.net
omnigyrlz (above l-r): julie, nicole, ruby, and shayla


------------------------------------------------------------------------

Here's my introductory message for you:
------------------------------------------------------------------------

welcome to our Yahoo! clubhouse @ teamomni...

------------------------------------------------------------------------

TO START SENDING messages to members of this group, simply send email
to teamomni@yahoogroups.com

If you do not wish to belong to the teamomni group, you
can unsubscribe by replying to this message, or by sending an email to
teamomni-unsubscribe@yahoogroups.com


Regards,

Moderator, teamomni


SPECIAL NOTE FROM Yahoo! Groups: Because Yahoo! Groups values your privacy,
it is a violation of our service rules for moderators to add subscribers
to a group against their wishes. If you feel this has happened, please
notify us at abuse@yahoogroups.com

P.S. If you would like to learn more about the teamomni group,
please visit http://groups.yahoo.com/group/teamomni

Your use of Yahoo! Groups is subject to http://docs.yahoo.com/info/terms/


===========================================

Um, it's a models message board. How do I belong to this club.
Bought more art. My next acquisitions will be given to me. That I swear.

 


Carrie Whitney is an art director at Fantagraphics Books. For the past two years, I've bid on her work at a local art auction, at SOIL, to no avail. So I just emailed her and bought a couple pieces. I think her work is really interesting and fun, although I'm concerned that someone who works at the world's premier art comic publisher would create a piece featuring a Star Wars Destroyer Droid.

All hail Carrie Whitney!
Sounds like Laurence of Arabia: "Shut up you minion, you (U.S.) agent, you monkey. You are addressing Iraq," Ibrahim said. "You are insolent. You are a traitor to the Islamic nation," he spat out as Qatar's Sheikh Hamad bin Khalifa al-Thani tried to shut him up.

Islamic Summit Rocked as Iraq Slams Kuwait

By Ghaida Ghantous

DOHA, Qatar (Reuters) - Bitter enmity between Iraq (news - web sites) and Kuwait erupted in a vitriolic name-calling match on Wednesday at an Islamic summit meant to unite the voices of the world's one billion Muslims against war.

In a clash caught on live television before the Qatar state broadcaster shut down transmission, Iraqi President Saddam Hussein (news - web sites)'s top aide Izzat Ibrahim departed from his text to zero in on the Kuwaitis sitting across the conference chamber.

"Shut up you minion, you (U.S.) agent, you monkey. You are addressing Iraq," Ibrahim said. "You are insolent. You are a traitor to the Islamic nation," he spat out as Qatar's Sheikh Hamad bin Khalifa al-Thani tried to shut him up.

A Kuwaiti delegate responded that the insults were "the words of an infidel and a charlatan," as the two sides shouted and gesticulated angrily at each other.

Key U.S. Gulf ally Kuwait, which is publicly grateful to Washington for leading a coalition that liberated it from Iraqi occupation in 1991, is hosting thousands of U.S. Army and Marine forces in preparation for a possible invasion of Iraq.

Kuwaiti Foreign Minister Sheikh Sabah al Ahmad al Sabah told reporters the clash proved that only the voluntary exile of Saddam and his leadership could avert war.

This step was "the only thing and the miracle that can end this matter and the miracle is in the Iraqis' hands," he said.

Muslim leaders had hoped the emergency summit of the 56-member Organisation of the Islamic Conference (OIC) would send a clear message opposing an attack on Iraq.

But no new initiatives to halt the drive toward war were discussed, and the summit only agreed a broad statement on Iraq which said diplomacy should be given more time.

The written statement was not read on Qatar television, which only broadcast general closing remarks.

"Islamic countries would not participate in any military action which targets the security and territorial integrity of Iraq or any Muslim country," the statement said.

In fact, several Gulf states plus OIC member Turkey host U.S. forces and bases which would be used in an attack on Iraq. As Muslim leaders flew out of Doha, U.S. heavy transport aircraft were flying in, continuing the military buildup.

Only a quarter of OIC members sent their heads of state to the one-day gathering, the latest in a series of top-level Muslim or Arab gatherings called at short notice in a desperate but so far unavailing bid to halt the slide to war.

RELIGION UNDER THREAT, SAYS IRAQ

Ibrahim, second-in-command of Iraq's Revolutionary Command Council told the members of the world's largest Islamic grouping that they were all at risk from "the reckless and foolish United States" and said Baghdad expected "concrete steps to support Iraq against this tyrant."

"There should be a point-blank refusal of any aggression and no help should be given to this enemy... We hope Islamic nations can face the challenge that is before them," he said.

"In the face of this bitter reality, we must rally our forces and the foremost condition for our success is joint Muslim action," Ibrahim added. "We must not allow anyone to break our ranks or religion will be wiped out and our territories placed under foreign control."

Iraqi Foreign Minister Naji Sabri again rebuffed proposals that Saddam go into exile to avert war, telling reporters it was President Bush (news - web sites) who should "step down and leave other people to live in peace."

"Any call for stepping down should be asked to Mr. Bush. He is causing his people and his country to be hated all over the world, isolated all over the world, becoming Public Enemy Number One all over the world."

OIC Secretary General Abdelouahed Belkeziz said the Islamic nation "with all its political weight, power and resources" could make its voice heard if it was united and sincere.

But recent Arab and Muslim summits on the Iraq crisis have been marred by arguments and initiatives lost in dispute.

"I think the Arab and Islamic world is divided because we do not know what we want to do," Qatar Foreign Minister Sheikh Hamad bin Jassim bin Jabr al-Thani told the summit's closing news conference. "We do not speak with a single voice."

Tuesday, March 04, 2003

My little sister and her little freind Colleen called me all excitedly last week. They were totally going to go to that Great White show that ended so many promising young lives. IT COULD HAVE BEEN THEM!!!! Don't you understand?!?!?!?! Gen-Y now has it's own 9/11. Peace out.
Club Pickle is now open for business.
Who are these people coming here from, of all places, a Star Wars message board? Please identify yourselves. Thank you.
Yesterday I thought I was sick. Turned out I was just irritated. Fuck you.

Friday, February 21, 2003

The news just keeps on coming. Coming on the heels of last weekend's club crush in Chicago, Great White destroyed a club in Rhode Island with an indoor pyrotechnics display. The guitarist is among the missing and presumed dead. Which amuses me. Heh.

10 Dead, 100 Hurt in Huge R.I. Club Fire

By AMY FORLITI, Associated Press Writer

WEST WARWICK, R.I. - A huge fire engulfed a Rhode Island nightclub during a rock concert's pyrotechnics display, causing at least 10 deaths and 100 injuries, authorities said.


AP Photo


AP Photo
Slideshow: Rhode Island Nightclub Fire

Dozens Killed in R.I. Nightclub Fire
Fire Capt. Russell McGillivray said an estimated 10 to 20 people died. He said many of the victims were found in the front door area after they apparently frantically rushed to the exits. More were possibly trapped inside.

The blaze broke out at about 11 p.m. Thursday during a pyrotechnics display during a Great White concert at The Station in West Warwick, about 15 miles southwest of Providence. The club quickly went up in flames and little was left of the one-story building hours later.

"The place went up within a matter of two minutes," witness John Kudryk told the Providence Journal.

At least 100 people were taken to area hospitals including Rhode Island Hospital in Providence and Kent County Memorial Hospital in nearby Warwick, said Town Manager Wolfgang Bauer.

Paul Vanner, the club's sound technician and stage manager, said more than 300 people were at the concert. One person from the band was missing, he said.

Chaos erupted moments after the blaze broke out. Witnesses said dozens of people rushed toward the exit, and those who escaped were later seen staggering into a triage center. Rescuers carried dozens of people on stretchers.

Hundreds of firefighters and police from across the region and dozens of ambulances were on the scene. Rescuers were pulling badly injured victims from the fire as ladder trucks poured water over the flaming skeleton of the building.

"It was calm at first, everyone thought it was part of the act," said John DiMeo, who was sitting at the bar near the front door when the fire started. "It happened so fast."

Jack Russell, the lead singer of Great White, told WJAR-TV he checked with the club's manager before the show and the band's use of pyrotechnics was approved. He said he felt the heat of the flames while on stage.

"This place went up like the Fourth of July," he said.

Town Manager Wolfgang Bauer couldn't speculate on the specific cause, but said a flame from the pyrotechnics display hit styrofoam in the ceiling.

"Everbody knows there were pyrotechnics used in there," he said. "We found people in a corner of the building. So there are dead people in there."

Great White is a 1980s heavy metal band whose hits include "Once Bitten, Twice Shy" and "Rock Me." The concert also featured the Canadian group Fathead.

The fire comes four days after 21 people were killed and more than 50 injured during a stampede in a Chicago nightclub that began when a security guard used pepper spray to break up a fight.
Amusing interview with Joss Whedon. 100 questions. Amusing fact: Wheon is married. I thought he was gay. And no, you PC-types, he refers to the wife as she.

Best exchange:

78. Have you ever broken the law?

Mostly just kidnapping ...
Well, to brighten my day, I bought some art from Molly Kiely:



Good times.

Interesting footnote: inspired by the art purchase, I went to the Fantagraphics Books warehouse to buy some Molly Kiely comics. While there I ran into Ellen Forney, who was also there buying... Molly Kiely comics! Small world.
Quote of the day, from Roger Ebert: I am aware this is the second time in two weeks I have been compelled to quote Lear, but there are times when Eminem simply will not do.

Wednesday, February 19, 2003

Why would anyone name a club "Pickles"? Let alone a sex club? It's a world gone mad...

Swingers' club patrons sue BSO over raids, arrests in '99

BY NOAH BIERMAN
nbierman@herald.com

Four years after masked sheriff's deputies exposed Broward County's salacious swinging subculture to a national audience, the men and women in the clubs are suing the raiders of the private clubs.

''They were subject to numerous newspaper articles. They were subject to notoriety that they didn't bring to themselves,'' said Daniel Aaronson, part of a legal team representing two couples arrested in the raids. ``They believe they were wrongly arrested and their lives were put in disarray for no reason.''

Lawyers have filed a total of five lawsuits, on behalf of 10 people, against the Broward Sheriff's Office or individual deputies involved in raiding two swingers' clubs in January and February of 1999. The consenting adults want money for the humiliation they suffered. Three of the suits were filed within the past five weeks and all but one is in federal court.

The men and women are among 55 club patrons and employees arrested on lewdness charges by masked deputies carrying automatic weapons. None was found guilty of a crime and most of those arrested had their cases dropped by prosecutors.

Still, the arrests helped Jay Leno add a few jokes to his opening monologue. They gave 48 Hours viewers a scintillating reminder of the go-go 1970s, Broward County-style. And they created a stir in South Florida workplaces, forcing some people to leave jobs, accept transfers or avert stares.

Among the plaintiffs: Tonya Whyte, who claims she was put on administrative leave from her teaching job and that the state tried to decertify her. The plaintiffs also include Raymond Lynette Hall, both in law enforcement at the time of the arrests.

Teams of sheriffs deputies raided two clubs four years ago -- Trapeze II in Fort Lauderdale and Athena's Forum in Pompano Beach -- using undercover officers who wore towels and watched men and women take their clothes off and perform sexual acts.

Four of the 10 people suing admit they had sexual contact in the clubs.

Their lawsuits claim deputies made false arrests, because a judge ruled that someone other than a police officer has to be offended by allegedly lewd behavior to make it a crime. One couple, Lloyd and Alyse List, claim their rights were violated when deputies searched their personal belongings, including a locker assigned to Lloyd List.

Sheriff Ken Jenne's public information office was closed Monday and there was no comment from BSO about the lawsuits. After the raids, in a July 2000 interview, he said they were ordered by a subordinate without his knowledge.

The sheriff's office had conducted a similar raid in 1997, arresting 17 people at a club called Pickles. Two patrons sued the sheriff's office and settled for $5,000 and $6,000.

The 1999 raids became a cause celebre for the swinger culture, with a report in Playboy magazine and chatter on the Internet. Trapeze owner Alan Mostow's story was featured in a Hustler magazine story titled ``Revenge of the Florida Swingers.''

Beverly Pohl and Bruce Rogow, representing Jenne and the deputies, say the current batch of claims do not amount to false arrests. The deputies who made the arrests had probable cause to believe the men and women were breaking the law, Pohl said.

Although some of the plaintiffs denied sexual activity, officers consistently and explicitly described sexual activity in every case, she said. And even if they weren't engaging in sex, being in a lewd club is enough probable cause for an arrest, Rogow said.

Pohl and Rogow make an especially ironic defense team for the sheriff.

In the early 1990s, they sparred with former Broward County Sheriff Nick Navarro over the rap act 2 Live Crew, whose performances and records were labeled obscene by the former sheriff. Rogow sided with the rap group back then.

Pohl said this case is different: ``We made an assessment and felt that the sheriff has the better legal argument.''

Thursday, February 06, 2003

................................................................
I've been sort of incommunicado the last few weeks. Busy at work, busy writing. I'm in charge of the Artist Trust Benefit Auction and Brunch, coming up this Sunday. If you're in Seattle this weekend, stop by! But there's a lot of stress doing it. Also preparing an application to curate a group show at Bumbershoot, Seattle's art festival. More on that if my application is accepted.

Anyway, I've been experimenting with drugs for my bipolar disorder. I go from depression, to anxiety, although on good days, the mania manifests as euphoria, which is a pleasant change of pace. My new medication, Effexor, initially made me feel better, but I was still having a little anxiety and depression. So they doubled my dose, which had interesting results. Pyschosis. I had no idea how crazy I could be, until a few weeks ago. Fits of rage, paranoia, I even found myself stalking some guy in a supermarket. In fairness, he dissed me. We were in line at checkout, he was three people behind me, I was next in line. A check stand opened, and the cashier invited the next in our line. Me. But this bastard rushed over, and so I had to wait. About a half hour later I realized I had followed him to another store, planning god knows what. Bad ju-ju. So, my doctor cut the dose a little, which brought back the symptoms it was supposed to treat, while continuing the psychosis.

Literally psychotic. So that was me. I was tapering off the Effexor. Apparently, the side effects of discontinuing Effexor are just like the side effects of taking it. In addition to the symptoms of depression and anxiety I was trying to treat, I was experience paranioa, nightmares, fits of rage, etc. And we have that auction coming up. This is not the week for me to fold. So I called my doctor, who is now on vacation. I had to negotiate with this nurse acting as the middle-man between me and some shrink. First, they say there's nothing that can be done. I am to deal with it. Then it was suggested that in order to prevent things from getting worse, I should keep taking the Effexor at my prescribed rate. I responded, well, I didn't consider it an acceptable approach to maintaining my current level of psychosis was a good solution, i.e. staying on a drug that was making me psychotic was a bad idea, even if going off it made it worse. So they said I should immediately stop taking it, and start taking my new meds. But what about this week? I asked. I cannot fold this week, I said. Can't I get happy pills to get me though the week? No, sez the medical establishment. There is no such thing; there are no happy pills. Really? respond I. What the fuck is Ativan? Librium? I'm losing my fucking mind here. It is then explained to me that the doctors don't consider those a good solution, becuase they're short-term, symptom-responsive medication, and highly addictive. I say to the nurse, okay, a couple things, and I'm sorry for raising my voice, and I'm trying not to yell. First, I don't give a goddman what the doctor's preference is, I give a shit about myself here, and I'm willing to risk a few short-term solutions to get me through the week. Second, talk to me about addiction when I'm coming for, i don't know, my SECOND prescription for this shit, not my first. Third, it is idiotic to tell me that keeping me is a psychotic state for the next seven to ten days is preferable in any way to prescribing some sort of immediate tranquilizer for the duration of the episode. That is just so gay. I get put on hold. The nurse returns from hold. Okay, two weeks worth of Clonezapam, whatever that is. They aren't get-you-high tranks, more make you feel normal. Which is fine by me.
Oh, fuck it. Here's a review of Minority Report. Or some thoughts, at least.

My mother purchased the dvd when I was back east for vacation. She actually got the full-screen edition, which answered the eternal question of who actually would buy one of those things. Anyway...

Luckily, it was a hit so my Philip K. Dick-inspired screenplay, Divine Invasions will make me rich, but I'm not sure it's worth seeing, otherwise. On its own terms as a summer thriller, the movie was fine, I guess, but as a Dick adaption, it was wanting. Spoilers follow, read if you dare.

It really isn't a Dickean nightmare if the system can be dishonestly manipulated by others against you. It's a Dickean nightmare if the system or reality itself is flawed, or if it turns against you or fucks up as a result of working properly.

The only flaws in pre-crime in the movie were as a result of user manipulation. If the minority reports were incorporated from the beginning, then it seemed like two dozen out of a couple hundred potential murderers would have been let off with a warning.

I was bothered by the lack of insight the psychics displayed. Could they distinguish between degrees of murder? When Tom Cruise shot the man, it was ultimately a suicide on the part of the victim, and I would think the pre-cogs would be able to identify the motives and reality behind the events, rather than projecting a purely visual display of the crime scene. If someone is going to stage a suicide to look like murder, and the psychics can't tell the difference, what good are they? In six years, you'd think it would have happened before. For a system dependent on psychic phenomena, it was used remarkably bluntly.

It seems like the filmmakers didn't think through the situation down to the details. How are actualy murders investigated or prosecuted, if at all? There certainly couldn't have been much of investigation into the other death pinned on him, otherwise detectives would have established that Cruise could not have committed the second murder he was blamed for, because he had a strong alibi, and his gun was in someone else's posession. Maybe it's my fault for thinking about it too much, but a movie needs to earn its suspension of disbelief, and MINORITY REPORT didn't.

I thought the rocket packs were a nice touch, actually; they seemed really crappy, in a Phil Dick kind of way. I like how the technology in Dick's stories seems to be carboard and scotch tape. In the story "Minority Report," the pre-crimes were reported as names on punch cards; the lack of nuance in the reporting is part of what propelled the plot.
My friend Erin Norlin has her website up and ready. She's really good. An excellent artist. Check it out! Look around, and you may find a hint of my Bumbershoot show...





Saturday, February 01, 2003

Woke up this morning with light in my eyes
and then realized it was still dark outside
It was a light comin´down from the sky
I don´t know who or why

Must be those strangers that come every night
Whose saucers shaped light put people up tight
Leave blue green footprints that glow in the dark
I hope they get home all right

Hey Mr.Spaceman, won´t you please take me along
I won´t do anything wrong
Hey Mr.Spaceman, won´t you please take me along
for a ride

Woke up this mornin´, I was feeling quite weird
Had flies in my beer, my tooth paste was smeared
I opened my window, they´d written my name
said: "So long, we´ll see you again".

Hey Mr.Spaceman, won´t you please take me along
I won´t do anything wrong
Hey Mr.Spaceman, won´t you please take me along
for a ride

Hey Mr.Spaceman, won´t you please take me along
I won´t do anything wrong
Hey Mr.Spaceman, won´t you please take me along
for a ride

Copyright @ 1966 Tickson Music
The Byrds "Fifth Dimension" LP Columbia Records 1966

Thursday, January 30, 2003

I wish I had written this amazing Hunter Thompson-esque article about DC war protests. Beautiful stuff.

Some excerpts:

After all, one would be hard-pressed to think of any circumstance not involving a pro-government counter-demonstration in which 40 journalists from major news organizations would attend a 9 a.m. weekend rally involving 80 illiterate morons. To use the Russian expression, crayfish will whistle in the mountains before 80 environmentalists in a park on a Saturday morning draw so much as a college radio intern, much less 40 of the country's heaviest press hitters. The mere presence of so much press at MOVE-OUT was monstrous.

So when I arrived at the scene I thought it would be amusing to count the total number of journalists, as opposed to actual protesters. And wouldncha know it, some members of the working press were offended by the exercise.

"You shouldn't be doing that now," a bearded Reuters hack told me, after suffering the indignity of being counted. "It's too early. The bulk of the crowd won't show up until later. Like around ten-thirty."

"Well," I said. "The Washington Post said this thing was supposed to start at nine. It's now nine-thirty."

"The Post was wrong," the Reuters man snapped. "If you want to be honest, you'll do this later."

"Let me get this straight," I said. "You're actually worried that I'm going to undercount these yahoos?"

"I'm saying," he said, "that if you want to be fair, you'll count when the crowd really shows up."

Next to the Reuters man stood a young blonde woman in black horn-rimmed glasses who identified herself as a reporter for The New York Times. She didn't offer her name, but another reporter there later told me that she was an assistant to Times reporter Lynette Clemetson. She'd been listening to my exchange with the Reuters man and decided to chime in.

"And the important thing isn't the numbers," she said. "This demonstration has more Vietnam veterans."

I shook my head, stunned. "Are you kidding?" I said. "The other demonstration will have a hell of a lot more vets than this one, I'm sure of that."

She frowned. "No," she said. "That one's going to be mostly college students. Kids."

"Maybe so," I said. "But just in terms of sheer numbers.... I mean, even half a percent of 100,000 is going to be ten times more vets than we're seeing here. There are about fifty people here, for Christ's sake."

"No," she said, not convinced. "No, this one will have more."

A third personage, a scrawny redneck protester in a baseball cap and a Gore-Tex face guard, was listening in. "That's the slimiest journalism I've ever seen," he said, jumping in. "You're in here and you're going to count us before we're even here. You wait until ten-thirty, then you'll see how many of us there will be. You're yellow journalism scum."

"Settle down, Beavis," I said.

"You wait until ten-thirty, you liberal bastard," he said.

I shrugged and walked away. An hour later, after suffering through numerous historically confused speeches about our victories over fascists in France and our spectacular, as-yet-unrecognized military successes in Vietnam, I counted all over. The final tally, again, was 80 protesters and 40 journalists—and that included the five-man Guardian Angel security entourage that followed speaker Curtis Sliwa. I sought out Gore-Tex face in the crowd.

"Hey, Chester," I said. "Eighty to forty. Nice turnout."

"Fuck you," he hissed. "We represent the real America."

"You know," I said, "I once went to a Suzanne Somers book signing. There were like three hundred people there. It was a book of poetry."

"Fuck you," he repeated.

"Our troops have always been there for us," he said, "from the time of World War I, when our soldiers beat back the fascists in France...."

I turned to Paul. "France?" I said. "Fascists? What the fuck is he talking about?"

Paul shrugged. "Forget it," he said. "He's on a roll."

I turned around. Behind me there was a man in a mesh baseball hat and glasses listening with rapt attention to Martin and brandishing a lovingly hand-drawn sign that read, painfully, "DISARM SADAM." I moved over to him.

"You're missing a D," I said.

"What?" he said.

"'Saddam' is with two Ds," I said. "You're missing a D."

He looked down at his sign.

"Listen," he said. "I can spell it any ways I want. Faggot."
Boy, what a week this has been. On Monday, I personally melted my work's email and internet. Also, my medication was causing a psychotic reaction. So, updating this hasn't been on my mind lately. Next week look for reviews of Band of Outsiders, Battle Royale, Blue Crush, and hilarious tales of not being able to find end-of-week drugs. Coming soon.

Friday, January 24, 2003

Just in time for the opening of Confessions of a Dangerous Mind...

He's Back...

The Unknown Comic's Official Web Page!

EDIT: a more in depth viewing of the web page prompted this additional post:

Wednesday, January 22, 2003

Great news from CNN. Not only is the cloned cat not an exact replica of the the original, it looks nothing like her! Ha!








Rainbow, left, nuzzles the ear of




Rainbow, left, nuzzles the ear of "cc," her clone, on January
8.

So. Buffy last night. As much as like the the new classroom aspect, I'll admit, it was annoying to hear how many lectures? Four? Jesus. And if the chick from Freaks and Geeks could kill a vampire her first tie out with a flag pole, how come those other chicken shits have been cowering for the last five episodes? Fags. And I was waiting for someone to remind Dawn she was the frickin' KEY, for god's sake. She once had the power to destroy the universe, and she remains to this day a being of mystical energy incarnated as a human, with all of reality warped to keep her there. Not special? Please.

Tuesday, January 21, 2003

The Onion rocks again. Sure, this rips off a couple of my ideas, but what the hell, Koreans and giant robots make me laugh.

Kim Jong Il Unfolds Into Giant Robot

PYONGYANG, NORTH KOREA—Responding to mounting pressure and increasingly confrontational rhetoric from the outside world, North Korean president Kim Jong Il unfolded into a 70-foot-tall, 62-ton giant robot Monday.












Above: Kim Jong Il marches through the streets of Pyongyang.
Above: Kim Jong Il marches through
the streets of Pyongyang.

"The DPRK's nuclear program is very much its own business, as is its right to determine its own path of security," said Kim, his torso splitting along ventral seams as clusters of Taepo-Dong ICBMs rose from his shoulders. "Any attempt by Washington to decide our fate will surely result in a sea of fire being unleashed upon them."


As his arms and legs sheathed themselves in bulletproof Mecha-Muscle telescoping outward from his chest, Kim reiterated his refusal to bow to international demands.


"Constant criticism from outside indicates mistrust of our promise to refrain from missile tests," said Kim, speaking over the mechanical shriek of wingblades sprouting from his back. "Only trust from the U.S. that we will keep our word can prevent World War III."


"The imperialist West is holding my country to standards which it does not see fit to meet itself," continued Kim, his voice now a metallic, digitized boom emanating from somewhere within the titanium helmet sheathing his head. "This does not surprise me, as they are well-famed for their lies."


"Pyongyang Dynamo Power Punch!" added Kim, as he released his fist-modules skyward with twin robotic uppercuts.


While the Bush Administration remains publicly confident that a diplomatic solution can be reached, top officials admit that the situation has become more complicated.












 Above: A South Korean border soldier eyes Kim Jong Il in the Demilitarized Zone.
Above: A South Korean border soldier
eyes Kim Jong Il in the Demilitarized Zone.

"If we add Kim Jong Il's transformation into a giant robot to his already defiant isolationist stance and his country's known nuclear capability, the diplomatic terrain definitely becomes more rocky," U.S. envoy James Kelly said. "Kim has made it clear that, if sufficiently threatened, he will not hesitate to use nuclear weapons or his arm-mounted HyperBazooka."


Added Kelly: "We are also forced to consider the possibility that Kim may attempt to robo-meld with other members of the Axis of Evil, forming a MegaMecha-Optima-Robosoldier. Kim would make a powerful right arm—or even a torso—for such a mechanism."


During a visit Monday to the Demilitarized Zone dividing the Korean peninsula, Kim stressed that his transformation was not an act of aggression, but rather an attempt to defend his nation's autonomy.


"The DPRK must not be subject to the whims of an international coalition with no regard for the welfare of the Korean people," said Kim before stomping the ground with his foot, unleashing a devastating ring of energy that vaporized nearby reporters and military vehicles. "Catastrophic Valiant Kim-Chee Earthquake Stomp-Kick!"

What kind of cute are you?

Which Cute-type are you?!?!

I'm Mysterious Cute!!




Shy and complexed!
Just b/c I steer clear from crowds
doesn't mean I can't be cute!
People are drawn to my private and introverted life.
I'm quirky and one-in-a-million.
I was in tears bpwerks

Friday, January 17, 2003

I'm going to have to rip off this news story for my novel. This is the best news of the weird to come out of Seattle in a long time.

Voters may get to decide whether Eyman's a 'horse's ass'
Friday, January 17, 2003

By DAVID AMMONS
THE ASSOCIATED PRESS

OLYMPIA -- Washington voters may get to sound off on whether initiative guru Tim Eyman is "a horse's ass."

David Goldstein, a Seattle computer programmer and technical writer, is pushing an initiative that says "The citizens of the state of Washington do hereby proclaim that Tim Eyman is a horse's ass."

Eyman said he thinks the idea is hilarious, and should garner publicity for his own latest initiative.

"It's stupid and there is no reason in the world why people should be able to put an initiative like this on the ballot," Goldstein said in a telephone interview Thursday night.

"My goal is to promote change (in the initiative process) and to achieve that, I think we need to bring ridicule on the process, to make people aware of how easy it is to abuse.

"Any schmoe can go to Olympia and pay $5 and file an initiative. I'm the schmoe who did it this week. Whoever claimed I had any credibility? I wrote an initiative about a guy being a horse's ass."

Goldstein told The Spokesman-Review newspaper in Spokane his stunt is "a type of political theater." After the newspaper ran the story Thursday, talk radio picked it up and Goldstein's phone was swamped all day.

Tax rebel Eyman is the state's leading initiative sponsor. Voters have approved at least one of his initiatives each year for the past four years, starting with $30 car license tabs in 1999.

Goldstein's initiative, which has not yet been assigned a ballot title or number, said in part, "Tim Eyman's ill-conceived anti-tax initiatives are an irresponsible means of legislating tax policy, an abuse of the initiative process and an insult to our system of representative democracy."

Eyman got in trouble with the state last year when he acknowledged that he took more than $200,000 in previous campaign contributions as a salary fund. He had steadfastly described himself as an unpaid taxpayer advocate.

The initiative noted that Eyman said "I just feel like an ass" after he acknowledged taking the money.

The punch line is that, well, the voters agree with him.

Goldstein said the initiative started as a party conversation about Eyman and "about how self-serving and pandering initiatives have become.

"People think initiatives are well thought out, but they aren't. We just wanted to get something people would vote for. We wanted something funny and outrageous, bordering on profanity, but not profane, so it could go on the air or in print.

"The word `ass' is a problem, but if you modify it with `jack' or `horse,' it's not. It's funny. It's saying the guy's a fool."

Goldstein said he'll run "a parody of a Tim Eyman campaign," hoping to secure the necessary 200,000 voter signatures by early July to ensure a public vote in November.

He already has a campaign Web site, www.horsesass.org. The site said he'll skim off 20 percent of the proceeds for personal gain.

So far, he has collected $70.

His Web site said, "If you agree that the initiative process has become a joke, join us in getting the last laugh. With your help, we'll show Tim that he's not the only horse's ass who can get a spectacularly stupid initiative on the ballot."

Eyman called the measure "very pathetic," but said he's still laughing about it. He said he plans to buy "Tim is a horse's ass" T-shirts, hats and mugs from Goldstein.

Eyman said Goldstein is unwittingly helping him by calling more attention to Initiative 807, which would impose strict state government spending limits and require a two-thirds vote of both houses to raise taxes.

"The goal of any initiative sponsor is to get people talking about the initiative any way you can. When the opposition does your job for you, you gotta say 'thanks,' Eyman said, adding, "Calling names? That's their strategy? Oh, that's persuasive."

© 1998-2003 Seattle Post-Intelligencer

Wednesday, January 15, 2003

Today I was waiting for the bus. You know, just pacing around, back and forth, pretty much in place, letyting my mind wander as I waited. At one point, a woman stopped at the traffic light, and I sort of paced toward the street. She locked her door.

Tuesday, January 14, 2003

For christ's sake, move the fuck out of Malawi!
Kinji Fukasaku died. He was in the middle of making Battle Royale 2, a sequel to the recent classic. In case you haven't seen it, Battle Royale is the story of a class of sixth graders, put on an island and told to kill each other until there is only one survivor. A true classic. So the director is dead. His son is taking over BR2. There's a trailer up. View it here.

Monday, January 13, 2003

Is Pete Townshend guilty? I'll tell you one thing, listening to "Uncle Ernie" will never be the same...

Friday, January 10, 2003

I just got into work. I'm having some sort of psychotic reaction. I'm very tired.

Thursday, January 09, 2003

The Popbitch item led me to this curious new item from MTV Asia...

Sugababes Appeal To Former Bandmate

Sugababes Keisha and Mutya are still concerned about the mysterious disappearance of their former bandmate, Siobhan. According to BBC's Radio 1, the girls still haven't had a proper explanation despite Siobhan's disappearance almost a year ago. They recalled Siobhan telling them she was off to the loo, and then vanished.
"We'd love to know why, you know, we were kinda stranded in Japan a day before we had to do a show in front of thousands, performing 'Overload' and us two going on stage by ourselves," they said.

"We'd just like to know, you know, why you said 'I'm comin' back in two minutes' and you never came back again. Then they came back and said 'Oh Siobhan's left 'cause she wants to do fashion photography. But then, a couple of weeks ago we read that she's doing a solo career."

"At the end of the day, a girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do. So if that was her way of splitting off and doing her own thing... then, whatever." -- SP

--------------------------------

Is this an honest-to-God disappearance? Should someone be concerned? And what is the deal with their names?

And I have to say, MTV Asia's international news page has hysterically funny stories, most less than 200 words, and apparently written by someone who combines laziness with irony, or a less-than-convincing command of the language.
I realize it's sinking low in online communication to just reprint notable emails, but I'm lazy. I was just added to the Popbitch mail list.

>From: Popbitch
>To: Popbitch
>Date: Wed, 08 Jan 2003 21:22:01 +0000
>Subject: "Spot the pram face"
>Message-ID:
>
>"Jesus Christ said suffer the little ones to come
>unto me, not that they should be eaten for public
>entertainment." - Anne Widdecombe MP
>---------------------------------------------------
>POPBITCH! _ _ _ _
>_ __ ___ _ __ | |__ (_) |_ ___| |__
>| '_ \ / _ \| '_ \| '_ \| | __/ __| '_ \
>| |_) | (_) | |_) | |_) | | || (__| | | |
>| .__/ \___/| .__/|_.__/|_|\__\___|_| |_|
>|_| |_| 08.01.03 *issue 147*

>subscribe or unsubscribe: http://www.popbitch.com
>our email: hello@popbitch.com
>
>* Axl Rose and the sad spiral of doom
>* Parlez-vous Council?
>* Charts: Girls Aloud spend 4th week on top
>---------------------------------------------------
>
>
> >> Jordan's Smoking Gun?
> Gareth: too quick on the draw
>
> Jordan says she was evidence to back up her
> claim to have slept with teen-mong Gareth Gates.
>
> Could it be a text message from Gareth
> apologising for shooting his load too fast, and
> promising it won't happen again...?
>
>
>---------------------------------------------------
>Rio Ferdinand was overheard at the recent Comedy
>Awards saying he'd like to shag Carol Vorderman.
>---------------------------------------------------
>
>
> >> Keep it together, Liza! <<
> Minnelli teeters on the brink
>
> Remember those scenes in Bowfinger when
> Eddie Murphy's character would mutter
> "keep it together, keep it together" in an
> effort to avoid going mad and having to be
> returned to his "celebrity relaxation centre"?
>
> Well, life imitates art. Liza Minnelli was
> shopping in the main Ralph Lauren store in
> New York over Christmas. While browsing through
> the racks of clothes, she stopped suddenly and
> started chanting to herself, "Minnelli, get it
> together. Minnelli, get it together..."
>
>
>---------------------------------------------------
>Shania Twain's brother Darryl is a bingo caller at
>the Londonderry bingo parlour in Edmonton, Canada.
>---------------------------------------------------
>
>
> >> Parlez-vous Council? <<
> No. 1: Pram Face
>
> "Pram Face": a phrase used to describe a popstar
> who has a face that looks more suitable on a
> girl pushing a pram round a council estate.
>
> (See Liz Atomic Kitten, Emma Bunton, Keisha
> Sugababe, the ginger one out of Girls Aloud etc)
>
>
>---------------------------------------------------
>Macy Gray's Christmas gift to members of her
>management team were boxes of live lobsters.
>---------------------------------------------------
>
>
> >> Big Questions <<
> Blind items leading the blind
>
> Which Tory MP left the following items
> in his desk pedestal over Christmas:
> 1 pair of soiled underpants
> 1 hard hat
> (They were found by cleaners)
>
> Which Manchester City player likes to wear
> his matchday kit while getting noshed off by
> girls at a hotel. His mate videos the action
> from a cupboard?
> (FYI: This story comes from the man who supplies
> DVD porn to two Premiership football squads,
> so, er, it must be true, right?)
>
>
>---------------------------------------------------
>Madonna's next single will be American Life, out
>this spring, with video by Jonas Ackerlund. She's
>planning a theatre tour later in the year.
>---------------------------------------------------
>
>
> >> Shirley not? <<
> Lord Jenkins: wonder shagger
>
>miserable_cunt writes:
> "I'm genuinely quite sad that Roy 'Woy' Jenkins
> has died because he reformed gay, abortion and
> divorce laws. But now he's dead, I suppose the
> Popbitch in me kicks in and I can inform you
> all that he had a fairly long affair with
> Hollywood actress Shirley Maclaine."
>
>
>---------------------------------------------------
>Eurovision fan boards are buzzing with the rumour
>that Cheeky Girls are being lined up as UK entry.
>---------------------------------------------------
>
>
> >> How Axl Rose finally lost it <<
> It was all down to one fur coat
>
> The Guns n Roses revival ended in riots last
> month, when Axl Rose refused to take the stage
> in Chicago. But what caused Axl to meltdown,
> after his triumphant performance in New York?
>
> After selling out Madison Square Gardens, Axl and
> entourage went on to celebrate at NY club Spa.
>
> When he got to the door, Axl was politely asked
> to remove his fur coat before entry (the club
> has a strict no fur policy). Being a Rock Star,
> he refused, but the club would not make an
> exception for him.
>
> And then Axl realised the truth. No matter how
> successful his comeback, he was no longer The
> Man. He could no longer sweep all before him
> like the golden god that he once was.
>
> So that was that: he refused to come on stage in
> Chicago. The tour is off. His manager has been
> sacked, band members have quit and no-one
> believes for a second that he will ever record
> the vocals for the new album.
>
>(FYI: It gets worse. Axl is today fighting to save his
>fabulous mountaintop Malibu mansion from forest fires.)
>
>
>---------------------------------------------------
>Courtney Love turned up at Joe Strummer's funeral.
>She threw herself on the coffin, wailing loudly
>like one of those toothless Middle Eastern ladies.
>---------------------------------------------------
>
>
> >> Bob Maxwell recruits via penis <<
> Semi-erection required for success
>
>judge_pickles writes:
> "Robert Maxwell bought a Squirrel helicopter in
> 1986 and insisted that the pilot must be a
> woman under the age of 28.
>
> "There was an anonymous recruitment campaign
> offering complete training at a cost of about
> £30,000. During the physical tests that took
> place at Robin Hill, Maxwell himself used to
> turn up. He watched the women doing the assault
> course from an underground hut that they used to
> run over before jumping over an eight foot wall.
>
> "The women would only pass on to the next part of
> the course if they gave Maxwell a 'semi'."
>
>
>---------------------------------------------------
>Oh Jesus. People are starting to talk seriously
>about The Spice Girls reunion tour.
>---------------------------------------------------
>
>
> >> People who should be hit with a sea-bass <<
> No 1: Trinny and Susannah
>
> A Trinny and Susannah album is in the pipeline.
> Provisionally titled You Wear It Well, the
> album will contain the girls' shockingly awful
> covers of their favourite tracks, including Rod
> Stewart, Barbra Steisand and.... Radiohead.
>
> Please... somebody... go to the fishmonger,
> buy a sea-bass, and hit the hideous witches
> in the face with it. We will reward you.
>
>
>---------------------------------------------------
>BBC newscaster Sophie Raworth has been told to get
>a Trinny and Susannah makeover for her hair.
>---------------------------------------------------
>
>
> >> Ned Kelly... <<
> The new Swept Away?
>
>Mr M writes:
> "I saw a rough cut of Heath Ledger's new film
> yesterday, "Ned Kelly" - the Australian outlaw.
>
> "It's shithouse of the highest order, especially
> Heath himself. He's meant to have an Irish
> accent, but comes off with a worst one
> than anybody in 'Gangs of New York". There's
> poor acting, crap editing, and the music (so
> far) is pretty bad.
>
> "This, my friends, is the turkey of the year."
>
>
>---------------------------------------------------
>Brad Pitt went to Kickapoo high school.
>---------------------------------------------------
>
>
> >> Things to make you go Hmm <<
> Ainslie, hairdressers and porn
>
> The theme to S Club's Seeing Double feature film
> is Who Do You Think You Are. Its not a cover of
> the Spice Girls single, thank God. But the
> chorus does include the lyric:
> "When You're A Clone,
> You Know You're Never Alone"
>
> Ainslie Fame Academy's old band, Suburbia:
>http://www.suburbiamusic.com/
>
> Ellen Morphonios, the judge who in 1969 prosecuted
> Jim Morrison for showing his cock at a Doors
> concert, has died. She was known as one of
> America's most hardcore judges, kept a
> toy electric chair in her chambers and had
> a pet chimp called Bubbles, who had to wear
> nappies to go to the courtroom.
>
> Israeli pets get ready for war:
>http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/middle_east/2604701.stm
>
> Poor Diana Ross. Not only did she get arrested
> for drink driving last week, but the police
> who arrested her made a video of her spectacular
> breath-test failure. When asked to stand on one
> leg and count to 10, she laughed and fell over.
> And couldn't remember the alphabet.
>
> George Michael porn-a-like. Love the socks!
>http://www.popbitch.com/images/porno020.jpg
>
>
> >> Chart Predictions <<
> New entries for Sunday 12 January
>
>++ Number One
>GIRLS ALOUD Sound of the Underground
>Cheryl's first concert was Steps: Nadine's
>was Westlife; Sarah's was Eminem; Nicola's
>was Take That and Kimberley's was Eternal.
>
>++ Top Ten
>ELECTRIC SIX Danger! High Voltage
>Vocal cameo from Jack White.
>
>DIVINE INSPIRAION The Way
>Producers Lee and Dave have been working
>together for 13 years: they got together with
>vocalist Sarah Jane after meeting in Menorca.
>
>ERASURE Solsbury Hill
>Cover of Peter Gabriel's 1977 hit.
>
>++ Top Twenty
>RICHARD ASHCROFT Silence Is Silence
>The PB messageboard opinion: its Fairytale
>of New York mixed with Julian Lennon's Saltwater.
>
>BADLY DRAWN BOY Born Again
>Band now features Andy Rouke from The Smiths.
>
>FLIP AND FILL I Want To Dance With Somebody
>Their banging house covers of 80s pop
>becoming very tedious now.
>
>AUDIO BULLYS We Don't Care
>Great video directed by Walter Stern, who
>also did Prodigy's Firestarter and The
>Verve's Bittersweet Symphony.
>
>++ Top Forty
>IN ME Crushed Like Fruit
>Essex hard-rock trio's first album Overgrown
>Eden is released this month.
>
>80s MATCHBOX BEELINE DISASTER Psychosis Safari
>Amen's Casey Chaos produced two of the
>additional tracks on this release.
>
>LEVELLERS Wild As Angels
>Band formed in 1988 in Brighton.
>
>
> >> End Bit <<
>
>Please email us stories, facts, gossip,
>news, whatever: hello@popbitch.com
>
>Thanks: icon, andy scott, 0898, BM, lisal,
>parchalb, jo, nigelnige, hollygolightly,
>isambardkingdombrulee,nubby, glitterkitty,
>C, bobbifleckmann, britnee, roys_keen, DF
>anthony, bk, mbs, bengobaz, godzilla, dishydave,
>huggle, CF, britnee, underscore, michael, thonglet
>
>
>*********************************
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>5. BBC for the talking Cyberman
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>
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>
>Old Jokes Home:
>A man goes to see an optometrist.
>The doctor says, "You have to stop masturbating."
>The guy says, "Why? Am I going blind?"
>The doctor says, "No, you're upsetting the other
>patients in the waiting room."
>
>Still bored?
>Check out what the web geeks recommend:
>http://www.b3ta.com/features/awards2003/


They appear to be from Britain. I just love how they speak this foreign language over there. Pram face, noshing, teen-mong, matchday kit... And who are some of these celebrities? Keisha SugababeIt? Lord Jenkins? It's like a nation of teenagers...
Scorcher says he is sure that these victims weren't "gangsta bitches but that they were well connected and there will be reprisals for this".
I'm going to start spelling my name without spaces.

DavidMiller.

See, that works.
Even though Christmas is over, there is still the perfect gift out there for me. As they said on Page Six a few weeks ago: Chances are Chic Happens will never get to sleep with Paris Hilton—let alone her hunky himbo, Tommy Hilfiger model Jason Shaw—but at least we can dress like we have. Brooklyn provocateur Ken Courtney's Just Another Rich Kid collection features T-shirts with slogans like "I Fucked Paris Hilton." Other celebs you can claim to have done the nasty with include Chloe Sevigny, Casey Spooner, Kelly Osbourne, Gisele and Anna Wintour. Fashion-designer groupies can choose from John Galliano, Alexander McQueen, Zac Posen, Yves Saint Laurent and even Christian Dior, who's been dead for almost 50 years. We'll look for our "I Fucked Bobby Trendy" T-shirts in the mail.

I don't know who Casey Spooner is, for example, but I want one that says I Fucked Paris Hilton. Check this out:



Isn't that genius? I mean, the skateboarders. What a hit on Chloe. Brilliant...
This morning started out tough. I had this awful dream that my estranged Aunt Pat had written a tell-all screenplay about our family, and only mentioned me once by name. Then I woke myself up by biting the tip off my tongue. Hell.

Wednesday, January 08, 2003

I wonder if there will be a time when we have all the characters on sitcoms being retards, and the neighbor next door is the normal one. Like put Andy Dick, Michael Richards, Jack from Will & Grace and Joey from Friends in an apartment, and have Howie Long be their neighbor.
Boy, that Buffy was pretty good last night.

I'm sort of enjoying the influz of new little Buffys. I wonder how many web sites Kennedy has got dedicated to her by now. I was sort of disappointed that the mini-Slayers didn't join in on killing the vampire at the end. I was sort of hoping for that, after seeing how tough the other trainees were at the season's beginning, that maybe these kids could suck it up and kick some ass. Too bad. It would have been cute.

I like how Faith's return is being kinda subtly set up. "I hear there's another Slayer."

Tuesday, January 07, 2003

First link of the new year: Visit the web site of Little Roy.



Jesus. Back from vacation.

Jesus.

Thursday, January 02, 2003

Wrote my first check of the new year yesterday. And I am proud to say I got the day, month AND year correct. I am a golden god.

Saturday, December 28, 2002

He likes to show his dominance by bobbing his head, and once he attacked his reflection in the coffee table and peed on it.

Tuesday, December 24, 2002

Once more, Savage Love has a winner column this week. Holiday sex. Here's an excerpt:

Last year, I moved to Seattle, away from my friends and family. As I left work on Christmas Eve, the homeless people were having a trash-can-fire, plastic-bottle-liquor hoedown on University Avenue. I figured "What the hell?" and decided to join in. I wound up sharing a bottle of cheap vodka with one particularly attractive homeless girl. My judgment eroded, I invited her back to my apartment. Before I could protest, she invited two of her friends to join us.

My Christmas Eves until this point in my life had been Norman Rockwell-esque clichés. This particular year, I had an all-night drunken orgy with three homeless girls. We fucked our brains out, baked cookies naked, and fucked some more. When I woke up in the early afternoon, the girls were gone. So were my wallet, most of my food, my toiletries, and my CDs.
Finally I Love The Holidays

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.
On this visit home, met the new addition to the family. Emma. If I had server spce, I'd post a picture. Actually, she sort of represents an idea I've had for a while; baby labs. I figured if one could do a bonsai thing on a lab and keep them puppy size for life, one could make a fortune. Well, Emma is a mutt, but looks like a black lab about six months old, and will never grow bigger. Very cut, lots of personality. She's having trouble ajusting to the idea of other children, but we'll all be gone soon, so she should be okay. It's funny watching her chew on the other dog.
My older sister got engaged the other night. Thought we'd never be rid of her. I'm glad I live on the west coast, which means I'll be able to avoid pretty much the whole wedding thing until I show up. They're talking about May. Seems a little soon, but I guess she's been waiting a long fucking time.
Merry Christmas. Bitches.

Sunday, December 22, 2002

Just a reflection on Lord of the Rings. I like how every third member of the largely New Zealand crew have names like James "Budgie" North or Henry "Axe" Slade. For me, at least, it conjures an image of a gang from the Road Warrior, sitting in a room full of computers, dressed in eye patches, football shoulder pads and leather aviator helmets, yelling shit like, "Oi! Skunk! Geddof yar arse an animate 'at fuckin' orc, eh!"

Friday, December 20, 2002

I'm so tired. I was on a plane next to a screaming baby. The mother stood in the aisle to rock the brat, so every time someone walked by, they'd have to bump me and wake me up.

Thursday, December 12, 2002

A friend was confiding in me the other day. Always a bad idea. Apparently things aren't going well with this guy she's seeing. They won't be seeing each other for a week, because a friend of his, a girl, is visiting from El Paso. This is their last chance to see each other before she has to return to Texas to serve federal time for cocaine dealing. My friend asked if I thought the guy was lying. I said, of course not. I mean, who would make that up. Then, I though, it's brilliant. I want to start dating someone just so I can spin such a web of lies.

Tuesday, December 10, 2002

Vicar tells children 'Santa is dead'

A vicar has apologised for telling children at a Christmas carol service that Santa Claus was dead.

He also told the congregation at St Mary's Church in Maidenhead it was impossible for so many presents to be delivered in such a short space of time.

The Reverend Lee Rayfield, of nearby St Peter's Church, has now admitted he made a terrible mistake.

He based his sermon on joke scientific research from the internet and says it was meant as a bit of fun for older children who already knew Santa did not exist.

He added: "I made a serious misjudgment of the ages of the children. I did not realise how young some of them were and I am sitting here now wondering how I managed not to realise.

"Even when I was there, I did not twig. I am mortified and appreciate I have put some parents in a difficult position with a lot of explaining to do. I love Christmas."

Mr Rayfield's comments came from a joke story that circulated on the internet earlier this year on how scientific research would dispel the myth of Santa.

It says Santa would have to deliver 378 million presents to 91.8 million homes in 31 hours. To do it, he and the reindeer would have to travel 3,000 times the speed of sound.

It says the reindeer would be vaporised within 4.26 thousandths of a second and Santa would be killed by 4,315,000 pounds worth of force.

Mr Rayfield is now writing a letter to parents apologising for the incident.


Story filed: 11:39 Tuesday 10th December 2002
Infographic

Thursday, December 05, 2002

Congratulations to the New York Post's Cindy Adams, usually the fifth wheel of Page Six, for today's all James Bond Special.

December 5, 2002 -- Call it trivia. Bond trivia



SO, despite James Bond approaching Medicare, this new "Die Another Day" job was his biggest opening weekend ever. So it brings up 007 lore:

Wardrobe folk claim Pierce Brosnan gained a bit during filming. "We had to let out his pants," said one. "We were calling the shoot, 'Diet Another Day.' "

A while back a private light-aircraft pilot thought Pierce, his passenger, could fly because, the figuring was, if 007 can, then surely Brosnan can. Well, he can't. The pilot offered the controls, asking: "Want to land it?" And the hero-for-hire said: "No, thanks, you can land it."

Anyone know a London crook once used Sean Connery's stolen credit card for a sting? Posing as his rep the sticky-fingered - or goldfingered or whatever fingered he was - con guy hit a New Burlington Street gallery and bought some $300,000 trinket. Scotland Yard eventually nailed him. Double-oh-seven did not.

Connery. Terrified of spiders. The famous "Dr. No" shot of the spider in his bed was first done with glass between him and Spidey, redone with a stunt man then re-redone with a mechanical bug. Still, scaredy Sean suffered a panic attack.

Connery's mechanical tarantula sold at Christie's Bond memorabilia auction for $3,200. Oddjob's hat netted $32,000. "Diamonds Are Forever" fakes went for as much as the real thing - $8,000 a stone. Bullets engraved with "007" from "The Man With the Golden Gun" brought $350 each.

Anyone know Bond's dad was christened Andrew, mom's maiden name was Monique Delacroix, he graduated Eton, Dr. No's first name was Julius, Harold Sakata ("Goldfinger's" Oddjob) won a silver medal in the '56 Olympics light heavyweight weightlifting class, and 1989's "License to Kill" was titled "License Revoked" until a survey showed only 20 percent of the unwashed knew what "revoked" meant.

Anyone know when HRH Prince Andrew made the same Commander rank as his movie hero, he began driving an Aston Martin sports car and kept telling friends: " 'Call me James Bond' and 'I've got a license to thrill.' "

Workers toiling in the Santa Monica home of Lois Chiles, who was 007's "Moonraker" playmate were subsequently handed her 8x10s with, "Hi, I'm Holly Goodhead." They were delighted. They sensed she was a bit of a someone but none could figure who or what.

More. I'm in the mood. Ian Fleming had his hero work at an ornate Empire desk but his modest bookshelf held "Modern Fundamentals of Golf" by Ben Hogan, Tolstoy's "War and Peace" with a gun concealed in the binding which went off if you pressed the end of the spine and "The Bible Designed to be Read as Literature" with its middle hollowed out for a Walther PPK 7-65mm automatic. Also Bond likes drumming, calypso, Wagner and "La Vie en Rose" whilst in the throes of romance.

This is the 40th anniversary of Bond movies. Maurice Binder, who created the film's logo, willed the memorabilia to his niece, New York p.r. gal Joanne Binder. She's been offered big money. She refuses to sell.

And Timothy Dalton hasn't "had one martini since I left playing 007. I'm sick and tired of that same wisecrack in every bar: 'Oh, shaken not stirred, eh?' "
Someone get me an address so I can send them my headhsot and resume.

Jerry Springer Opera Gets London World Premiere
Wed December 4, 2002 10:59 AM ET

LONDON (Reuters) - An outrageous opera based on Jerry Springer's lurid talk show is to have its world premiere at Britain's National Theater.
"It is exactly the kind of work the National should be doing: bold, scabrous, funny and beautiful," the National Theater's new director Nicholas Hytner said Wednesday.

In concert form, "Jerry Springer: The Opera" was one of the biggest hits at this year's Edinburgh Fringe Festival. Now it is to be given a full-scale production in London next April.

British composer Richard Thomas joined forces with comic writer Stewart Lee for an irreverent take on the American talk show that has become a worldwide hit with such programs as "Pregnant by a Transsexual" and "Here Come the Hookers."

Among the opera's showstoppers are a diaper fetishist confessing all to his true love, a dance routine by the Ku Klux Klan and Jesus launching into a swearing tirade against the Devil.